All-SCUM Team 1 - Sidney Ponson

I was inspired by the blog-created cards that are found at Badwax and the amazing Lebowski cards at Achiever Card Blog (and many others), so since I had a few moments, I dashed off a card to write about my most hated players . There are many little personal gripes and grudges I have against players (including an insignificant slight by Patrick Chewing that makes me hate him to this day) but I'm going to try to focus on players who I hate not just for their terrible attitudes and general personality terribleness, but also for their ineptitude on the field. Introducing the 2009 TMYH All-SCUM team.

A bit about the SCUMs. At first, I thought I'd try to be all clever by making it an acronym (you know, something like So Can't Use in the Majors), but scum is a good word to describe these guys. They're the guys who are unsightly on a roster, terrible space fillers who's every action irritates a fan. They're also hard to get rid of and end up staying with a team or in the bigs FOREVER.

So who better to inaugurate the SCUMs than my own personal Oriole scum-bucket, Sir Sidney Ponson (stats here). At first, he was an underachieving, potential star pitcher with a plus-four ERA. Then the tubby schmuck had a pretty good 2003 where he was dealt to the Giants at the trade deadline, for the awesome load of Kurt Ainsworth, Damian Moss, and Ryan Hannaman (nobodies), and then, like a true cancer, returned to give two years of terrible pitching and controversy. Knocked around on the ball field (6.21 ERA in his final season with the O's, 7-15 in the years since he's left the O's and sticking inconceivably with four different teams), he also knocked a judge in Aruba, DUI'd in Florida and in Baltimore, and was banned from international play for testing positive to a banned substance. He's fat, he's always had a terrible work ethic, he's a douche... Sidney Ponson is our first All-SCUM.

Manufactured Patches / By The Letter

So, I've got a few of the manufactured patches at home, both of the letter w/ auto variety and the commemorative patches made by Topps for this year's Series 1 and 2, and I'm pretty sure I hate them. Yes, everyone has their well documented reasons to like or dislike manufactured patches, but my principle reason for disliking them is that there is an arbitrary connection between the item and the player represented on the card. The main attraction to game-used jersey and patches is that the item included in the card was actually used in the game we love and collect, with the added knowledge that the item was worn by the player. A small swatch of fabric is nothing without the certified knowledge that the fabric had been worn by our favorite players and used in during a game. This limits the product to a specific usage and to a specific time period...thus, making it somehow rare or special.

You can extend that a manufactured patch that was on-patch autographed is also special because it was physically touched by said player. These cards tap into our hero worship/iconography, thus the patch is simply just another vehicle to get an autograph/personal connection from our heroes.

However, what about those silly patches that are just patches that were sewn by someone somewhere and has absolutely no connection to the event or person that it commemorates? I really think these are offensive. What is the value of a patch commemorating an All-Star game from 50 years ago? I understand that there are collectors who like the design or like the commemoration of those events, much like there are fans who love re-issues and buybacks. I, however, think these are bogus products made by cynical profiteers looking for another way to sell their blasters of junkwax. Where's the actual tie-in to the game? I think that we're doing a disservice by collecting these manufactured patches...thereby rewarding the card companies for being lazy. They just embroider away these worthless patches and collectors think of them as additional hits. They're terrible, but then again, they're here to stay, so I'm just shouting into the wind.

Saw this on eBay...I have a few of these auto/manu patches of Hanley...do you think it's worth the price to collect all the letters?

Tradebait for Jimthomefan500

Tradebait: Jordy Nelson

2008 Donruss Threads Rookie Collection #RCM-3 (#d 4/10)

Tradebait for Hanleys

So, here's how this trade bait works. I need Hanley cards that I don't have...best offer gets the following cards (each are individual trades).

2009 Topps Finest Ian Kinsler Refractor for any Hanley base card that I don't have. TRADE PENDING

2009 UD A Piece of History Adam Sandler shirt relic for any serial numbered insert/parallel of Hanley that I don't have. TRADE PENDING

2005 Prime Patches Wade Miller Auto and 3x relic (44/85) for any Hanley game-used and/or auto that I don't have.

Tradebait: Tom Brandstater

2009 Donruss Elite #194

It's What I Got: The Hanley List

Here is the updated list of what I have...not bad for mostly eBay work. Total, I have 219 cards with 151 unique cards. All doubles are available for trade.

Year	Company	Set	Card #	Serial #	# of cards
2002	Just Minors	Just Minors	6		1
2005	Donruss	Zenith	RC-1		1
2005	Topps	Bowman	BDP153	65/435	1
2006	Fleer	Tradition	98		1
2006	Topps	Allen & Ginter	260		1
2006	Topps	Allen & Ginter	260		1
2006	Topps	Bowman	204		1
2006	Topps	Co-Signers	107		1
2006	Topps	E-Topps	64	/999	1
2006	Topps	Topps	620		1
2006	Topps	Topps '52	77		1
2006	Topps	Topps '52	TCRC20	181/1952	1
2006	Topps	Topps '52	DD4		1
2006	Upper Deck	Series 1	83		1
2006	Upper Deck	Series 2	927		1
2006	Upper Deck	Upper Deck F/X	SM-HR		1
2007	Fleer	Fleer	RS-HR		1
2007	Fleer	Fleer	2		1
2007	Fleer	Ultra	DM-HR	149/160	1
2007	Fleer	Ultra	FG-HR		1
2007	Fleer	Ultra	70		3
2007	Topps	Allen & Ginter	11		1
2007	Topps	Allen & Ginter	95		1
2007	Topps	Allen & Ginter	95		1
2007	Topps	Allen & Ginter	AGR-HR		1
2007	Topps	Bowman	1		1
2007	Topps	Bowman Chrome	1		1
2007	Topps	Bowman Heritage	96		1
2007	Topps	Bowman Heritage	96		1
2007	Topps	Chrome	255		1
2007	Topps	Chrome	196		1
2007	Topps	Co-Signers	22		2
2007	Topps	Moments & Milestones	70	88/150	1
2007	Topps	Moments & Milestones	70	2/150	1
2007	Topps	Moments & Milestones	71	85/150	1
2007	Topps	Moments & Milestones	72	98/150	1
2007	Topps	Moments & Milestones	72	149/150	1
2007	Topps	Moments & Milestones	71	24/29	1
2007	Topps	Topps	HA-HR		1
2007	Topps	Topps	GN305		1
2007	Topps	Topps	GN330		1
2007	Topps	Topps	GN322		1
2007	Topps	Topps	GN319		1
2007	Topps	Topps	WM29		1
2007	Topps	Topps	255		1
2007	Topps	Topps	324		2
2007	Topps	Topps	655		1
2007	Topps	Topps	655		1
2007	Topps	Topps	467		1
2007	Topps	Topps	467		2
2007	Topps	Triple Threads	148	68/99	1
2007	Topps	Turkey Red	TRR-HR		1
2007	Topps	Turkey Red	170		3
2007	Upper Deck	Artifacts	AF-HR		1
2007	Upper Deck	Artifacts	45		1
2007	Upper Deck	Elements	CCE-HR	165/314	1
2007	Upper Deck	First Edition	LO-HR		1
2007	Upper Deck	First Edition	211		1
2007	Upper Deck	Future Stars	37		2
2007	Upper Deck	Goudey	46		1
2007	Upper Deck	Goudey	GG-HR		1
2007	Upper Deck	Masterpieces	CC-HR		1
2007	Upper Deck	Masterpieces	SG-HR		1
2007	Upper Deck	Masterpieces	56		3
2007	Upper Deck	Series 2	715		1
2007	Upper Deck	SP Authentic	AS-24		1
2007	Upper Deck	SP Authentic	17		3
2007	Upper Deck	SP Authentic	BL-33	3/25	1
2007	Upper Deck	SP Authentic	BL-33	36/50	1
2007	Upper Deck	SP Rookie Edition	17		3
2007	Upper Deck	Spectrum	SR-HR	11/99	1
2007	Upper Deck	Spectrum	SSW-HR	24/75	1
2007	Upper Deck	SPX	WM-HR	17/199	1
2007	Upper Deck	SPX	WM-HR	12/25	1
2007	Upper Deck	SPX	WM-HR	24/25	1
2007	Upper Deck	Sweet Spot Baseball	SW-HR		1
2007	Upper Deck	Ultimate Collection	PM-HR	48/50	1
2008	Topps	Allen & Ginter	80		1
2008	Topps	Allen & Ginter	80		4
2008	Topps	Bowman Chrome	63		2
2008	Topps	Bowman Sterling	BS-HR		1
2008	Topps	Chrome	111		2
2008	Topps	Co-Signers	45	172/300	1
2008	Topps	Co-Signers	45	337/400	1
2008	Topps	Triple Threads	20	1168/1350	1
2008	Topps	Co-Signers	45		3
2008	Topps	E-Topps	13	/749	1
2008	Topps	Finest	90		1
2008	Topps	Finest	FM-HR		2
2008	Topps	Finest	FMA-HR		1
2008	Topps	Heritage	233		2
2008	Topps	Heritage	317		2
2008	Topps	Moments & Milestones	91	57/150	1
2008	Topps	Moments & Milestones	92	115/150	1
2008	Topps	Opening Day	125		2
2008	Topps	Opening Day	125	949/2199	1
2008	Topps	Stadium Club	37		1
2008	Topps	Topps	AR15		1
2008	Topps	Topps	AS-HR	12/50	1
2008	Topps	Topps	TCHC41		2
2008	Topps	Topps	UH35		3
2008	Topps	Topps	425		2
2008	Topps	Triple Threads	TTRC-7	22/27	1
2008	Upper Deck	A Piece of History	CSC-RR	51/99	1
2008	Upper Deck	A Piece of History	FH-23	195/699	1
2008	Upper Deck	A Piece of History	TM-22	17/25	1
2008	Upper Deck	A Piece of History	TM-22		1
2008	Upper Deck	A Piece of History	38		3
2008	Upper Deck	Baseball Heroes	192	10/200	1
2008	Upper Deck	Baseball Heroes	192	7/25	1
2008	Upper Deck	Baseball Heroes	192		2
2008	Upper Deck	Baseball Heroes	68		3
2008	Upper Deck	Documentary	3035		1
2008	Upper Deck	Documentary	1612		1
2008	Upper Deck	Documentary	712		1
2008	Upper Deck	Documentary	3575		1
2008	Upper Deck	Documentary	4295		1
2008	Upper Deck	First Edition	121		1
2008	Upper Deck	Goudey	259		1
2008	Upper Deck	Goudey	77		6
2008	Upper Deck	Masterpieces	CC-HR		1
2008	Upper Deck	Masterpieces	37		3
2008	Upper Deck	Series 1	147		3
2008	Upper Deck	Series 1	365		4
2008	Upper Deck	SP Authentic	MM-21		1
2008	Upper Deck	SP Authentic	76		5
2008	Upper Deck	SP Legendary Cuts	GEN-AR		1
2008	Upper Deck	SP Legendary Cuts	66		3
2008	Upper Deck	Spectrum	38		2
2008	Upper Deck	Spectrum	SS-HR	92/99	1
2008	Upper Deck	SPX Limited	WM-HR	20/50	1
2008	Upper Deck	Sweet Spot Baseball	S-HR	213/300	1
2008	Upper Deck	Sweet Spot Baseball	SS-HR		1
2008	Upper Deck	Sweet Spot Baseball	44		2
2008	Upper Deck	Timeline	6		2
2008	Upper Deck	UD Premier	PSTI-HR	71/75	1
2008	Upper Deck	X	43		2
2009	Topps	Heritage	10		3
2009	Topps	Series 2	450		1
2009	Topps	Toppstown	TTT7		1
2009	Topps	Toppstown	TTT7		4
2009	Upper Deck	A Piece of History	BSM-HR	30/180	1
2009	Upper Deck	Goudey	75		2
2009	Upper Deck	Series 1	141		2
2009	Upper Deck	Series 1	475		3
2009	Upper Deck	Series 1	442		2
2009	Upper Deck	SP Legendary Cuts	GM-BR		1
2009	Upper Deck	Spectrum	38		3
2009	Upper Deck	Spectrum	38	18/50	1
2009	Upper Deck	Spectrum	SS-HR	35/35	1
2009	Upper Deck	SPX	GJ-HR		1

Blaster Break: 2009 Topps Series 2

Only the "hits" from two blasters from Target. I didn't want to start on Series 2 but finally couldn't resist the pull.

Comm. Patch Cards
LPR-81 Reggie Jackson
LPR-64 Jackie Robinson

World Baseball Classic
BCS6 Jose Reyes

Turkey Red
TR59 Mel Ott
TR68 Lance Berkman
TR88 Michael Young

Gold
327 Jason Bartlett 1120/2009
455 Adam Jones 810/2009
501 Jeff Suppan 1119/2009
627 Billy Butler 616/2009

Legends of the Game
Frank Thomas
Mariano Rivera
Juan Marichal

Career Best Legends of the Game
Roy Campanella
George Sisler
Lou Gehrig

and a personal note: got the Hanley base. Hooray for me!

One box 2009 Donruss Elite

Continuing in the non-baseball, non-Hanley card indulgance, here's a box break for a football product. It's also here on Sportscard Forum. I might get pics up later but then again, these cards aren't that pretty.

Hits:
#25 Prime Targets Jason Witten Jersey 152/299
#25 Chain Reaction Larry Johnson Patch 33/50
#135 Everette Brown rookie auto 93/299
#194 Tom Brandstater rookie die-cut auto 24/24

Rookies:
#117 Cameron Morrah 643/999
#144 Jared Cook 05/84
#166 Bear Pascoe 662/999
#167 Michael Crabtree 578/999

Inserts:
#34 Elite Series Patrick Willis 579/999
#6 Passing the Torch Don Maynard/Dustin Keller 741/999
#21 Chain Reaction Antonio Gates 350/399
#3 Zoning Commission Brandon Marshall 149/399
#25 Prime Targets Jason Witten 160/399
#10 College Ties James Laurienaitis Brian Robiskie 231/399
#1 Stars Drew Brees 114/199
#4 Prime Targets Anquan Boldin 14/199
#18 College Ties Michael Crabtree 165/199

Overall, not my favorite football product (for reference, I'm a fan of the Leaf Certified Materials from last year. Don't know what that says about me other than Sportscards Uncensored would want to probably punch me in my face). The base cards are ugly. The inserts are, eh, alright. I could do without die cutting, since it just means there are more corners to have to protect. The patch LJ is a nice three break. The autos are obviously misses. Overall, I'd give it a solid C.

Anyway, I'll get back to Hanley baiting soon.

Break: Gems of the Game

So, this will be the first meaningful post on here in over a year. I'm Chuck. I collect cards. Let's begin with a terrible blaster I bought at Target because I'm a rube.

Gems of the Game, 20 Assorted NBA Packs...retail $24.99.

I haven't had a chance to splurge on some new hobby boxes, so this had to tide me over. I figured it would make a terrible box break and I could just complain. Wish fulfilled.

Pack 1: 2007-8 Fleer Hot Prospects
#23 Michael Jordan (wow, a hit base with the first pack)
#57 Zydrunas Ilgauskas ...the slowest man in the league
#22 Elton Brand
#ST-13 Stat Tracker insert Daniel "Boobie" Gibson

OK, pack one was a retail hit.

Pack 2: 2007-8 Fleer Hot Prospects
#6 Michael Redd
#59 Marcus Camby
#19 Ben Gordan (will he ever be a legitimate star?)
#SC-8 Supreme Court insert Adrian Dantley (features a paler than normal Stockton in the lower left)

Wow, two packs, two inserts...we're doing really well.

Pack 3: 2006-7 Upper Deck UD Reserve
#115 Rashad McCants (I sure hope he does well someday, since I have a /15 AUTO card that I'd love to make a profit on)
#UD-TC Tyson Chandler Game Used JERSEY! (Unbelievable, is there such a thing as a loose retail pack blaster hot box? Other than the ones that have the Ultimate or Triple Threads packs?)
#127 J.R. Smith

OK, three packs, two inserts, and a jersey...I'm hoping for a rookie auto next!

Pack 4: 2003-2004 Upper Deck Standing "O"
Wow...Lebron rookie year...what a stupid product name.
#24 Steve Francis
#77 Morris Peterson
#82 Jerry Stackhouse mini
#25 Yao Ming

These are some hideous looking cards. The front features a huge basketball and the player in the foreground. A lot of white on the borders. The back isn't bad, but they abbreviate the first names. Why? Terrible...especially seeing Stacklouse in a Wiz jersey...I hate that guy. Oh, and a game piece "The Game" with a Sorry, Try Again scratch off. Yippee. 3/4 good packs isn't bad.

Pack 5: 2007-8 UD Artifacts
#53 Kevin Garnett (says Celtics on the card, but image is during the Twolves tenure)
#60 Peja Stojakovic (is it weird that I like this player?)
#24 J.R. Smith...again
#28 Baron Davis
#76 Shawn Marion (this guy won me a couple of fantasy titles...now he's a scrub. Weird.)

3/5 ain't bad.

Pack 6: 2007-8 UD Artifacts
#32 Tracy McGrady
#83 Kevin Martin
#98 Gilbert Arenas (Hooray, I hope he comes back healthy)
#48 Jason Kapono (Isn't it strange that this guy might have a longer career than Adam Morrison or J.J. Redick combined?)
#68 Grant Hill

That was a terrible pack. 3/6.

Pack 7: 2007-8 SPX
#95 Grant Hill (He looks so happy when healthy...Gil, aspire to be Grant!)
#104 Rookie Authentics Thaddeus Young (hey, a RC!)
#26 Jason Richardson
#32 Kevin Martin
#69 Andrea Bargnani (Is he a bust?)

These are some good looking cards...I'm going to count the RC as a winner. 4/7.

Pack 8: 1994-5 Fleer Series 1 JUNK WAX SPECIAL!!!
Holy crap, there are 21!!! cards in each pack.
#201 Willie Anderson (I had a friend in Jr. High who loved Willie...when we would play basketball, he'd always hoist up clanker threes while saying "Willie to win the game!")
#39 Brad Daugherty (Oh, these Cavs broke my heart)
#174 Danny Ainge (Suns uniform...looking old)
#20 Frank Brickowski (I don't remember this guy but what a name)
#204 Vinny Del Negro (He's a coach, Danny's a GM...feeling old)
#150 Patrick Chewing!
#118 Glen Rice
#178 Kevin Johnson
#24 Hersey Hawkins (This guy should have retired a Sixer...seeig him in a Hornets jersey seems wrong)
#207 J.R. Reid
#11 Rookie Sensation Lindsey Hunter (not a bad career. Ugly, ugly card)
#112 Sedale Threatt
#82 OMG Carl Herrera
#227 John Stockton (HOFer)
#4 Duane Ferrell
#73 Keith Jennings
#108 Floppy Divacs
#213 Shawn Kemp (I saw him recently on Pros vs Joes. He can still kinda make it drizzle)
#91 Derrick McKey (he had a solid career)
#221 Tyrone Corbin

If anyone wants these cards, let me know, otherwise I'm dumping them all except the Stockton and Ewing.

Pack 9: 1994-5 Fleer Series 1
I'm not going to open it because I don't want to type them in. Ugh.

Pack 10: 2007-8 Topps
#85 Jamal Crawford
#8 Mike Miller
#43 Paul Millsap
#GN18 Generation Now Monta Ellis (Another Fantasy stud from years past...I hate these GN cards. They're ugly and don't serve a purpose in a Topps set. Save these sequential event cards to something like Moment and Milestones. Ugh)
#126 Nick Young rookie card (I hope he turns into something decent for the Wiz)
#133 Wilson Chandler ugly blurry throwback card. Terrible.

I'm going to call this one a fail. 4/10.

Pack 11: 2007-8 Topps
Gotta love the variety
#38 Andrea Bargnani
#40 Chris Paul (CP3!)
#109 Randy Foye (I like this guy mainly because he doesn't have a NBA name)
#20 Kevin Garnett (going finger roll!)
#133 Wilson Chandler rookie card
#111 Greg Oden old ugly blurry throwback. Also terrible.

4/11. I should have removed the packs in a different order. Suckage is back heavy.

Pack 12: 2007-8 Topps
#39 Luol Deng (should've gone to Duke, punk)
#26 Peja (shooting a prayer over Nazr Mohammed)
#1 Amare Stoudemire (love the shot)
#GN15 Marvin Williams Generation Now (bustoroni, right?)
#112 Kevin Durant rookie card (that's a hit)
#132 Jared Dudley ugly blurry throwback. Yuck.

That's going to go as a hit. Nice Durant. 5/12.

Pack 13: really? Thanks for the variety, 2007-8 Topps
#96 Zydrunas Ilgauskas
#55 Smush Parker
#104 Kevin Martin
#58 Jason Richardson
#10 Elton Brand
#49 Chris Wilcox
#31 Shawn Marion
#OTG1 Mikki Moore Own the Game (he was the FG% leader? Did he shoot enough baskets to qualify?)
#135 Aaron Brooks rookie card
#116 Yi Jianlian rookie card
#104 Kevin Martin ugly blurry throwback card.

I refuse to say this is a good pack, though it was stuffed with rookies, inserts, and a bunch of horizontal cards. 5/13.

Pack 14: 2007-8 UD First Edition
#18 Hakin Warrick
#56 Brad Miller
#55 Kevin Martin (I could start a player collection of Kmart with all these base)
#21 Bobby Jackson
#DN19 Draft Notices Jason Smith (a military motif for basketball players drafted...I think this makes me angry)
#229 Carl Landry rookie
#167 Antonio Daniels
#113 Morris Peterson
#130 Chris Webber (maybe his last year in the NBA...too lazy and tired to look it up. Will this not end?)
#103 Samuel Dalembert

Bad pack. 5/14.

Pack 15: 2008-9 UD First Edition
#65 Yao Ming
#73 Al Thornton (nice)
#44 Kenyon Martin
#250 Chris Douglas-Roberts rookie
#242 J.R. Giddens rookie
#133 Carlos Arroyo Gold Parallel
#SQ-28 Starquest Brandon Roy (that's going to count as a hit just to keep myself interested in this thing)

6/15

Pack 16: 2007-8 Fleer
#3 Richard Hamilton
#30 Kirk Hinrich
#63 Kyle Korver
#178 Deron Williams
#171 Bonzi Wells
#156 Lamar Odom
#RS-14 Rookie Sensations Rodney Stuckey (anyone else think of pecan rolls)
#86R-151 Joakim Noah 1986 Fleer style (this guy is a douche)

Bust. 6/16.

Pack 17: 2007-8 Upper Deck
#134 Jeff Foster
#123 Zydas Ill (I just don't care anymore)
#173 Pau Gasol
#65 Mike James
#78 Damien Wilkins (who???)

6/17

Pack18: 2007-8 Topps Chrome
#73 Jameer Nelson
#32 Shaq...finally, a Shaq
#160 Al Horford rookie card
#84 Sebastian Telfair

Not bad, we'll count that as a hit. 7/18

Pack 19: 2005-6 Upper Deck
#76 Shaun Livingston (it's a shame about him.)
#170 Big Shot Bob
#107 Kevin Garnett
#218 David Lee rookie (please, Free Lee from NYC!)
#79 Kobe (three nice cards in a row)
#55 Baron Davis...not shabby
#110 Wally Szczerbiak...and it ends at four.
#146 Steve Nash
#RS23 Monta Ellis Rookie Scrapbook (good card)

Hit me baby. 8/19.

Pack 20: Ending how we started, UD Reserve
#132 Channing Frye
#149 Shavlik Randolph
#MVP-DN Dirk Nowitzki MVP Watch (nice insert)

Hit. 9/20.

So, was it worth it? No. Not for the price of some nice hobby packs. Skip it, don't be a sucker people.